Universal Message Delivered Thrice

Hello! It's been a bit I know; why so long you ask? I've been contemplating some themes of late. Last week was really hard. This is not everything that happened that was hard, but it's the top three, in the order they occurred:
1. We had to put our Izzie to sleep.
2. I ate meat.
3. I rear-ended a BMW.

Here's the skinny:
1. Izzie was declining in health; she had lost weight and couldn't jump up on the counter and other high-seeing and far-reaching places that the Official Guard Kitty of Knitsburgh would most like to her great advantage survey the estate from. She then began having trouble with her hind legs. On Friday, I found her asleep on the couch and she had peed there and was just lying in it, not a thing most cats would do, being persnikity about the placement of each hair and whisker even when there is no company coming. On Saturday I went to work and when I came home, she stumbled over to the water fountain and toppled face-first in. I had to pick her up and dry her off and cried and then called the vet. I don't know how they understood a word I said. We took her in and the vet gave us three possibilities; thyroid, diabetes or renal failure. We hoped for the first two options as we could treat her but the bloodwork revealed renal failure, end stage. We put Izzie to sleep as nothing could be done at this late stage in her condition.

2. Nature Boy and I had dinner Tuesday night at the estate. We opted for an Italian meal of meatballs and spag. Nature Boy had real homeade meatballs and I had the Whole Foods vegan versian. We ate, and it was delish, with garlic bread piled high. Nature Boy kindly took care of stashing the leftovers and cleaning up cause he's just awesome like that.

The next day, after coming home from work and changing into comfy clothes (it's a wonder anything fits me at all of late), I came down to find a distraught Nature Boy. He says, "I have some disturbing news." I brace myself; someone in the family sick or hurt? He's leaving me because he can't stand the irrational fine-one-minute-crying-the-next-nature of my being of late? He says, "I think you took my spaghetti for lunch." My stomach lurches, I feel disgusting, I ate the body of a mushed up dead cow and it's in my belly! And my baby isn't vegan now! And that was hours ago so I can't barf it up cause it's surely in my intestinal tract! Oh the horror!!!! Then the rationalizing; at least it was meatballs which have other things in them besides meat, like breadcrumbs and cheese and ....EW!!! I ate cheese too!!! YUCK!!! We did somehow end up laughing about it later, what else could really be done?

3. Traveling home from work on Friday, chatting away on my cell phone no less, I hit a beemer. That's not the worst; on Saturday I gave my driver's license to the vet staff and then realized it expired the day after my birthday this year. So I hit a beemer and am not a legal driver. I pull over behind it, tears already welling up. I see the driver, a man, get out to survey the damage. Which I'm sure will be extensive. And I don't have a license that is not expired. And I was talking on my cell phone too which must surely be another charge. I get out of my car and the man comes up to me and I wince, getting ready for him to begin screaming at me. He says, "There's no damage, I think we're good." I offer my insurance info and he declines!!! I then burst into tears and he asks if I'm ok; I tell him I'm fine, just pregnant and crazy and he drives off.

So this is what I believe I need to do; PAY ATTENTION! Pay attention to cats who drink a lot, lose weight, get weak, pee a clear fluid; these are symptoms of renal failure, not just "old age" and cats as young as 7 can apparently be prone to this situation. If caught early on they can be treated for a time. Pay attention to the food you are grabbing from the fridge, then putting into your body! Pay attention to the world around you and the road and the people and the animals and the trees and the lights. I need to keep my head out of that fuzzy, daydream state it's been relaxing in and rejoin the moment as it is.

I would also like to say this: Whole Foods, I testify to the goodness of your vegan meatballs in that I could not apparently tell I was eating real meat and not your lovely pure non-meat goodness, that's how good you made them. Thanks for making them so good. You are good.